I miss having a priesthood holder in my life.
I'm making a lot of decisions right now that are important to me, and I wish I had a male authority figure in my life who I could turn to and rely on to be guided by the spirit to give me direction on where I should go. I frequently find myself trying to fill this fatherly void, but there's really nothing like having the real thing. It was just this week that I realized that I actually had this empty space, possibly because I never did rely on my dad for counsel like I might have. It's days like these that I think that my life was probably more messed up than I realized at the time.
And with that, I am going to bed.
(for any who may stumble upon and read this and not know what I'm talking about, you might check out mormon.org and get some questions answered)
(and as a short disclaimer, I am in fact happy and healthy and strong and emotionally sound, so don't anybody think I'm some wreck or anything. Just pondering is all :) with a little wishful thinking)